what a loser..

I think I am a coward
And I am didn't shame of it because it is so damn true
Maybe for another people I am such a braver, got nothing to fear of
always speaks whatever comes to mind...
But, this case is different
not only I have no guts to speak to him, I even didn't have guts to saw him in the eye
Maybe I am just afraid that he will see my feeling right through my eyes

I am such a liar
pretend that I really have no feeling for him more than friend
Acting like I never have a special attention for him
and every time a friend tried to match maker us I just laugh out loud
and said it so impossible because I had no feeling for him
But deep down inside I do..and it's getting stronger everyday

I asked God today to take away this feeling of mine
I just can't live with this lie anymore
But, instead of dissapear this feeling keep on growing stronger everyday
makes me go insane..
Insane coz he just didn't have the same feeling as I do
and it hurts...really hurts

I usually be a person who always have a solution for this "love-sick" thing
but, it's so ironic that I even can't help myself from this situation
Makes me think about what people said that love is just a game that u can't win
Is it?

And tonight, as "Put Your Head On My Shoulder" by Michael Buble keep repeating over and over again on my winamp playlist,
I just can't get him out from my mind
I even picture us sitting next to each other, holding hands, no words said just keep each other's heart warm with love..
aarrrgghh...!!
Can somebody tell me how to erase all these feeling, and all the memories in my head??

And the other side of my heart won't let me fight for his love
because my heart said that when he not call you,
or he didn't return all the affection you gave then he is just not that into you..
So, why bother?
Okay, heart...you and me...against this feeling..tonight!


Cheers,
=)'Che

a fool..??

When it comes to love no one can even think straight.
What is it about love, so people can be more like themselves?
What is it about love that can make even a very rational people can go insane?
What is it about love that can make a brave one be such a coward..
What is it about love that can make u can feel safe and insecure at the same time?
What is it about love that can make my feet weak, my strength dissapear, my tongue can't even say a word..all the chosen words dissapear.
Some say act speak louder than words, but for me sometimes I just can't act in front of a special person.
So my words represent it all.
That's why sometimes people misunderstood and think I am not serious..
Well, this is just me
I take time to say it all..

Cheers,
=)'Che